Personal Desire

I have come to the point in my travels that allows me to reflect on those around me. I realize that this blog is not just for helping others with my experiences but also allowing me to express how I see myself.

At this point in time I would like to reflect on my love life. I know that I have many loves, but in this instance I am only talking about three. I refuse to say which three nor will I say that one is one of the three if asked. I just want to talk about my relationship with these three.

It is impossible for me to rate one above the other for each have a very different role in my life. What I can say is that my feelings for each of them are almost the same. For each of them I would love for nothing more than to take them to some far away land where it is just the four of us. I would take them to somewhere that we would be the only ones there and that we would have to rely on no one but each other.

I have realized that in the instance of these three women, it is not simply enough for them to be happy. I feel that I should be the only one that makes them happy. My mind sees this as a greedy action, and it probably is, and as such it comes into conflict with my other want, which is to live with as little selfish wants as possible. I try to keep away from the seven deadly sins as best as possible. I know that I am not the best at doing such, but I do try.

These three women seem to have captured my mind and have ensnared my heart. Now my path is confused but happily so.

Still if I could keep them to myself I would. Is that wrong of me? Probably. But at least it is the truth about how I feel.